08 Jul Indigemama’s Journey
Today we are celebrating the launch of Indigemama.com by sharing Panquetzani’s story in her own words.
We hope what she shares about her business/branding/website journey resonates with you, and is helpful in your own process of stepping into your highest visions and dreams:
TRUST yourself to take that step beyond what you *think* is possible…into the realm of infinite possibilities!
Dear friends and supporters of Indigemama,
We are thrilled to announce the launch of our NEW WEBSITE! Sounds simple and typical, I know, but let me share the SPOOKY back story…
In February of 2012, I decided to finally formalize my small women’s wellness practice and make my passion a full-time gig. After changing my business name from “Doula Panquetzani” (2008), to “Indigemama” (2012), I began my arduous quest for a website. I tried two different platforms, Wix and Square Space. My Wix content got deleted before I was able to save everything. I was too angry to start from scratch again. Square Space took me hours to finish, and in the end it looked typical, uninformative, and boring. Not me at all, because, I’m so atypical, informative, and FUN! Right? I allowed these barriers because bottom-line, I was SCARED to have a website.
Learning traditionally, through apprenticeship, I recall some of my mentors being scared of attracting attention. They refused to accept new clients sometimes. They told me horror stories of colleagues that had been targeted and fined, arrested, deported, and frightened into leaving curanderiso or Mexican Traditional Medicine. If an institution uses repressive tactics on you enough, you begin to crack. I had to take into account the historical and current abuse Indigenous Doctors have experienced without taking on the internalized oppression of my mentors, teachers, and family. I fully owned, trusted, and had seen my work help hundreds of women- but I was still mortified of being seen by a larger, unknown crowd.
Strangers noticed me anyway. I was being called to this work by folks from multiple countries and dozens of cities. I knew I had to work through my fear and surrender to my don, or calling. I did some research, figured out what was legally safe for me to say, practice, promote and implemented practical ways to protect myself as an alternative healer. I faced the fact that my people kept our medicina alive, despite being shamed, punished, and murdered for practicing our theology and science. Native peoples survived a genocide and historical atrocities. If I didn’t continue this work, then what will I have done with the blood of my people? Besides that, what else would I do? Everything else is boring. Yawn.
I put on my big girl nahuas (since I don’t wear chonnies) and told myself that I can practice my art, be who I am, earn a living helping people, and do so without fear in my heart, or womb. I contacted Dream Inspired Design (I’d been eyeing them for two years) and worked out a contract. I only had enough for the down payment, but trusted that if this was my path, that money would come. Money made it’s way, just in time for each payment to my developers. This might sound weird, but it felt so good sending Dream Inspired Design my money. So good. So right. Makes me want to pay them again, just to be reinvigorated.
After I removed the blocks I put up for myself, I was able to attract the right developers, the financial means, and empower myself with trust in the path I walk. For all of you who would like to see me, here I am. For those of you outside of Southern Cali, make sure to check my Calendar of events for a tour list I update monthly.
On behalf of Panquetzani’s nahuas,